I have a huge fear of many things.

I'm scared of letting people down, of hurting people, of making someone uncomfortable, of being a burden, of not being good enough...

And I'm scared that if I do these things that I'll either get left or be asked to leave.

A lot of events in my life have led me to this view that I filter life through.

And even more unfortunate is that sometimes, well.. a lot of the time... I view God through this lens too.

If I don't read my bible enough.. If I sin enough.. If I ask him for too much.. He won't want me anymore.


God's love for us NEVER falters. He wants to be in relationship with us. That's why he sent Jesus.

But, if I'm really honest with myself, that just seems too good to be true sometimes.

But that's the beauty, it is true.

I'm covered. I'm loved. I'm accepted. God won't leave me.

I so dearly want to believe this all the time.

Daddy, help. Help me believe this. Please help me believe in your true character. I'm sorry that so often I don't. Please forgive me. Please help my unbelief. I want to believe.

Jordan Edwards